Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Scammers

I love scammers, they are SO stupid.  I've mentioned before that they are endlessly amusing. 

Today I got three calls from "Jake" at "Microsoft" about a problem with my software.  I needed to update it "right away"...

Hint, if a company calls you, its fake.
Hint, if they want information they already should have, it's fake.
Hint, actually, if they call you at all, it's fake.
Hint, if it's "urgent", it's fake.

Companies don't call you.  They don't know you you exist..

Hint, if they speak bad local language, it's fake.
Hint, if they speak AT ALL, it's fake.  Microsoft isn't going to call you even if they knew a huge asteroid was about to land on your city.

Hint, if they all are named "Jake", its fake
Hint, if they call several times in a day and are too stupid to stop calling after you laugh at them, it's fake.

Hint, see above about "if they call at all", its fake.

I received a 3rd telephone call from "Jake" at "Microsoft" today (in different voices) and I stated to him clearly "Sir, you are an obviously liar and should be the victim of an honor killing".  THAT set him back a bit.  He asked how I knew. I just laughed and told him I sure wasn't going to help HIM learn how to scam others.

How did I know?  Well, all those hints above.  Plus dirty little secret; I don't HAVE a microsoft computer attached to the internet. 

But not like it would have helped him any if he had claimed to be calling from Apple...  I mean, obvious is obvious.  Apple doesn't know me from Adam either.  Maybe I'm running a Unix, LOL!

And there was the emails.  "My Microsoft email had exceeded it 20Gb limit, it said".  Three times in one day!  Straight to trash along with the emails from the Nigerian Prince. 



5 comments:

Fuzzy Tales said...

Last month I had *8* calls in one day, to my WORK number, by one particular scammer. Who refused to give up even though I became very rude and obnoxious with him after call #3 or #4.

After that I left my phone on call forward for a couple of weeks. Any time I'd take it off, sure enough, it would be the 800- number (I usually jot them down and Google them).

Beyond stupid if they can't clue in they're calling a business and that the person is on to them.

I have call display at home (at work too) and simply don't pick up unless I know the number. It's pointless, they don't seem to get the message.

Mark's Mews (Marley, Lori, Taz, and Binq) said...

Feel free to forward them to me. Im getting good at ruining their day.

Just Ducky said...

Yeah, mum can spot them, but if she doesn't recognize the number, she won't even answer the phone!

Megan said...

I have an unlisted phone number, so I seem to be missing all this fun! LOL

Megan
Sydney, Australia

Katie Isabella said...

This is good. I never ever ever fall for any of this crappola as I know the same things you know, But I am forwarding this to a friend of mine who might be able to use it. I asked her not to answer or do what they say. Good blog. No, they don't know anything at all about you or your computer or your system or what software you have and most of all the real company NEVER calls. YOU call them.

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