Given the Penn State University scandal, I have to say my own bad experience.
I got over it (I thought), and it never SEEMED to bother me too much, but I've been thinking about it lately. It always seemed a bit weird. I can only hope someone out there can corroborate my strange experience,
The first year I attended The University of MD, I took Physical Education class. We played tennis, football, etc. I have good memories of that football. I was a small guy lined up against very bigger guys. I crashed at them as hard as I could. One of the big guys even said afterwards, I was the hardest hitting little guy he ever met. I did what I could. So I was pleased with the physical education class,
The next is going to sound weird. Part of the Pys Ed class involved swimming and diving, The teacher/coach ordered us not to wear bathing suits. Because "the lint in the bathing suits was a problem". OK, I would know that was wrong today. I didn't then. An adult guy told us to do it and we did. All the other guys went along. I did too because they did.
We swam and dove naked for 2 weeks in the pool. There was no inappropriate touching, but it was still wrong. I am angrier today about it than I was then. I wish now that I had gone to the Dean of the College. And I am starting to understand that it bothers me more to this day than it did then. It was all more wrong than I could understand at the time. I feel guilty that I didn't say anything at the time. I know now that that was dumb.
I/we weren't molested directly. But being watched naked for a couple weeks had an effect on me,
And it may not be an accident that I suddenly have hiccups.... This has begun to bother me many days and nights.
I had to finally tell about it to try to get it out of my mind.
Who should I talk to?
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Veterans Day, Part 2
I feel that I never do right by Veterans Day. I can't really; I did not serve in time of war, nor in the military at all. I don't mean that I couldn't have eaten lousy food, slept in mud, or hiked through rain. I've done that.
What I mean is that I am not a loyal group person, and that I just will not follow blind orders. I would not have been the person you needed to trust in battle. That doesn't mean I'm a pacifist. I would kill a real enemy without any serious compunction. I might actually make a good guerilla fighter.
So I would like to spent a few minutes honoring those who did serve, in war or not. You did what I could not. You learned to work together as a team preparing or actually engaging in terrible situations. You learned to follow orders. More importantly, you learned to follow orders yet act individually when circumstances required it. That is a great part of our military; follow orders but also be trained and able to act on your own.
I was born in 1950. Too young for WWII or Korea, too unwilling to volunteer to fight in Vietnam, and too old for military training after that. I took my chances in 1969 (1970?). When the draft lottery was announced, I dropped my college deferment. I would have gone. My number was 256, and I was passed by. I was not exactly saddened by that. I did not consider the Vietnam War to be the same as WWII.
I grew up hearing of the then-recent WWII. I had family members who fought, and luckily, none of them died. I respected then greatly. I respected all WWII military greatly. Family history says one uncle dropped a bomb down a Japanese destroyer smokestack and sank it. Other family members were in other fields of war, or spend the war building ships.
It is partly for reasons like that that I minored in history in college. I studied wartimes. I watch wartime documentaries. The bravery of soldiers matters. I am not one of them. But I have done the best I could to try to understand.
If the respect or thanks of a civilian matters, I offer it. If you refuse it because I did not participate, I understand.
I cannot salute you, as a civilian. But there seems to be a Roman Empire gesture that civilians could use respectfully (there is some disagreement on this) to their soldiers. Right arm held out, hand angled down. If that is correct, I offer it.
Please accept my gratitude for defending your country whenever called upon.
What I mean is that I am not a loyal group person, and that I just will not follow blind orders. I would not have been the person you needed to trust in battle. That doesn't mean I'm a pacifist. I would kill a real enemy without any serious compunction. I might actually make a good guerilla fighter.
So I would like to spent a few minutes honoring those who did serve, in war or not. You did what I could not. You learned to work together as a team preparing or actually engaging in terrible situations. You learned to follow orders. More importantly, you learned to follow orders yet act individually when circumstances required it. That is a great part of our military; follow orders but also be trained and able to act on your own.
I was born in 1950. Too young for WWII or Korea, too unwilling to volunteer to fight in Vietnam, and too old for military training after that. I took my chances in 1969 (1970?). When the draft lottery was announced, I dropped my college deferment. I would have gone. My number was 256, and I was passed by. I was not exactly saddened by that. I did not consider the Vietnam War to be the same as WWII.
I grew up hearing of the then-recent WWII. I had family members who fought, and luckily, none of them died. I respected then greatly. I respected all WWII military greatly. Family history says one uncle dropped a bomb down a Japanese destroyer smokestack and sank it. Other family members were in other fields of war, or spend the war building ships.
It is partly for reasons like that that I minored in history in college. I studied wartimes. I watch wartime documentaries. The bravery of soldiers matters. I am not one of them. But I have done the best I could to try to understand.
If the respect or thanks of a civilian matters, I offer it. If you refuse it because I did not participate, I understand.
I cannot salute you, as a civilian. But there seems to be a Roman Empire gesture that civilians could use respectfully (there is some disagreement on this) to their soldiers. Right arm held out, hand angled down. If that is correct, I offer it.
Please accept my gratitude for defending your country whenever called upon.
Friday, November 11, 2011
Monday, November 7, 2011
Michael Jackson
I'm tired of hearing about Michael Jackson, his strange life, his spiral into near-lunacy, the charges of child molestation, his death, and FINALLY the last gasp of the trial of his doctor. I'm glad it's over.
I am not big into "celebrity".
But I recognize talent. Michael Jackson was probably the most multi-talented entertainer I have ever seen. He could dance better than Fred Astaire and Elvis Presley combined, he could sing with a breathless passion, and he produced songs (so far as I know) of an originality slightly beyond the Beatles or Bob Dylan. The Moonwalk, Billy Jean, and Thriller amaze me to this day almost 30 years later. But that WAS almost 30 years ago.
I regret the curse of great riches that happens to some people. As it did Michael Jackson. Some people can handle money, some can't. Jackson couldn't. I wish he could have stayed "merely wealthy". At some level of income that would have have made his life great but not overpowering.
I couldn't like him in his last 20 years. He just became too weird. He "lost touch". We will probably never really know what drove him down his own personal rabbit hole, and I regret it happened, as I would regret it happened to the poor and average among us. But it happened.
I an reminded of a question in a Philosophy class. "Your very good tennis partner is accused and acquitted of child porn. What do you do?"
My answer was "play tennis, but not allow him to babysit the kids". I gave reasons, of course; it was an essay question. But that was the the core of the answer.
In the same way, I admire Billy Jean and Thriller, etc, but I am vaguely glad that he is gone... And with the trial of his "doctor" over and done, I hope to never hear his name again on TV.
I am not big into "celebrity".
But I recognize talent. Michael Jackson was probably the most multi-talented entertainer I have ever seen. He could dance better than Fred Astaire and Elvis Presley combined, he could sing with a breathless passion, and he produced songs (so far as I know) of an originality slightly beyond the Beatles or Bob Dylan. The Moonwalk, Billy Jean, and Thriller amaze me to this day almost 30 years later. But that WAS almost 30 years ago.
I regret the curse of great riches that happens to some people. As it did Michael Jackson. Some people can handle money, some can't. Jackson couldn't. I wish he could have stayed "merely wealthy". At some level of income that would have have made his life great but not overpowering.
I couldn't like him in his last 20 years. He just became too weird. He "lost touch". We will probably never really know what drove him down his own personal rabbit hole, and I regret it happened, as I would regret it happened to the poor and average among us. But it happened.
I an reminded of a question in a Philosophy class. "Your very good tennis partner is accused and acquitted of child porn. What do you do?"
My answer was "play tennis, but not allow him to babysit the kids". I gave reasons, of course; it was an essay question. But that was the the core of the answer.
In the same way, I admire Billy Jean and Thriller, etc, but I am vaguely glad that he is gone... And with the trial of his "doctor" over and done, I hope to never hear his name again on TV.
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Computer Scare
I have a confession. I am hard on inanimate objects when I get angry. I have punched holes in walls, in hollow doors, and I have been known to throw things. There are reasons why some people live alone...
Don't worry, I never take out anger on people or pets. I also play online computer games with other people. That's not really a good combination.
I thought I had ruined my computer last night. I was playing Risk and had won 3 games in a row, and reached a level where I was playing a real expert. I had him on the ropes when suddenly I couldn't make any moves. After 3 turns of complete frustration, I threw the wireless mouse at the wall. It broke apart quite satisfactorily...
I had an older wired mouse to replace it. I still couldn't make any moves. The keyboard went next, then the wineglass (which had only ginger ale). So I shut off the computer. I spent the next hour on my hands and knees carefully collecting bits of glass in a small wastebasket so the cats wouldn't step on them. That was penance...
This morning, I set about reconstructing the computer... The wireless mouse went back together well, the keyboard was plugged in... Nothing. I tried an older keyboard. The only problem with it was a "B" key, so it should have at least worked otherwise. I tried an older wired mouse that would only scroll up. That didn't work either. I checked the monitor for power, it had it. Rebooting my Mac-Mini, I could hear the power-up sound. The monitor would come on with the "no signal" graphic normal at start up. I was baffled. I tried every combination I could think of.
I worried about what scheduled blog posts said that I meant to edit. I worried about emails I wasn't receiving. I worried about what I was missing on the CB...
I was so annoyed that I ate dinner early because I didn't have anything else to do.
I kept going at it all night. I am not skilled at computers, but I am analytical and persistent.
-->
-->
-->
The monitor connection to the computer had come loose...
All is well. The wireless mouse still works, the keyboard still works, the computer still works. Meanwhile, I feel pretty stupid... Throwing things at walls never accomplishes anything useful.
Don't worry, I never take out anger on people or pets. I also play online computer games with other people. That's not really a good combination.
I thought I had ruined my computer last night. I was playing Risk and had won 3 games in a row, and reached a level where I was playing a real expert. I had him on the ropes when suddenly I couldn't make any moves. After 3 turns of complete frustration, I threw the wireless mouse at the wall. It broke apart quite satisfactorily...
I had an older wired mouse to replace it. I still couldn't make any moves. The keyboard went next, then the wineglass (which had only ginger ale). So I shut off the computer. I spent the next hour on my hands and knees carefully collecting bits of glass in a small wastebasket so the cats wouldn't step on them. That was penance...
This morning, I set about reconstructing the computer... The wireless mouse went back together well, the keyboard was plugged in... Nothing. I tried an older keyboard. The only problem with it was a "B" key, so it should have at least worked otherwise. I tried an older wired mouse that would only scroll up. That didn't work either. I checked the monitor for power, it had it. Rebooting my Mac-Mini, I could hear the power-up sound. The monitor would come on with the "no signal" graphic normal at start up. I was baffled. I tried every combination I could think of.
I worried about what scheduled blog posts said that I meant to edit. I worried about emails I wasn't receiving. I worried about what I was missing on the CB...
I was so annoyed that I ate dinner early because I didn't have anything else to do.
I kept going at it all night. I am not skilled at computers, but I am analytical and persistent.
-->
-->
-->
The monitor connection to the computer had come loose...
All is well. The wireless mouse still works, the keyboard still works, the computer still works. Meanwhile, I feel pretty stupid... Throwing things at walls never accomplishes anything useful.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Unhappy Halloween
This may sound strange. I don't like Halloween. I used to. I used to carve pumpkins and stay by the front door to give out candy and admire costumes.
But about 6 years ago, no kids came to the door (or my neighbor's) and after a couple years of that, I just stopped trying. I don't eat candy, so I had to throw it away after the holiday. I started just ignoring Halloween.
To avoid an odd single trick-or-treater disturbing the evening meal, I started just blacking out the windows and turning the room lights off to signal I wasn't participating.
Until THIS year! I read in the local newspaper that sex offenders in many places were REQUIRED to do what I was doing. Turn out the lights, not give out candy... Oh GREAT, if I DON'T give out candy and participate, I will be viewed as a sex offender by some neighbor, and you know how rumors spread...
I batted that back and forth all day in my head, and I hate to say that I caved!
I worry about rumors. I'm an aging (61) single guy; the modern version of aging females considered witches in the older days. So I rushed out to buy candy, kept all the house lights on, ate dinner early, and waited for trick-or-treaters. None came. Well, the cats were happy, they HATE the doorbell!
And you know what I noticed at prime trick-or-treating time? Half the houses on my street were dark! Either I live in a very BAD neighborhood, or THEY weren't worried about appearances... So a good lesson about appearances.
Now WHAT do I do with a year's supply of Hershey Hugs...?
But about 6 years ago, no kids came to the door (or my neighbor's) and after a couple years of that, I just stopped trying. I don't eat candy, so I had to throw it away after the holiday. I started just ignoring Halloween.
To avoid an odd single trick-or-treater disturbing the evening meal, I started just blacking out the windows and turning the room lights off to signal I wasn't participating.
Until THIS year! I read in the local newspaper that sex offenders in many places were REQUIRED to do what I was doing. Turn out the lights, not give out candy... Oh GREAT, if I DON'T give out candy and participate, I will be viewed as a sex offender by some neighbor, and you know how rumors spread...
I batted that back and forth all day in my head, and I hate to say that I caved!
I worry about rumors. I'm an aging (61) single guy; the modern version of aging females considered witches in the older days. So I rushed out to buy candy, kept all the house lights on, ate dinner early, and waited for trick-or-treaters. None came. Well, the cats were happy, they HATE the doorbell!
And you know what I noticed at prime trick-or-treating time? Half the houses on my street were dark! Either I live in a very BAD neighborhood, or THEY weren't worried about appearances... So a good lesson about appearances.
Now WHAT do I do with a year's supply of Hershey Hugs...?
Monday, October 31, 2011
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Mulch
So I was shoveling the mulch out of the trailer. Here are pictures...
First step. shoveling the mulch away from the back so I can remove the back of the trailer...
Half done...
3/4...
The pile off the trailer...
The mosquitos got too fierce. I had to stop. The only good thing about the skeeters this time of year is that they are slow. Still, I got 8 bites. It was that they were around my face that made it hard.
Really, it was harder than it looks... It was close to like chopping ice off the driveway...
Monday, October 24, 2011
A Neat Trick
My most immediate outdoors project is emptying the trailerload of mulch. And I made good progress at it today (about 2/3 emptied - pictures another time). Unfortunately, the mulch is packed down by rain and weight and it has to be broken loose in chunks even using a mulching fork. That was a bit of work.
So I took a breather every 15 minutes and walked around the yard a bit, which is semi-forest and lots of field weeds. Guess what, those triangular sticky-seed plants are in full seed! I can never remember the name of the plant and I never remember what it looks like, but if they grow where you live, you know the seeds. By the time I was done with the mulch for the day, my pants were coated with 100s of them. I HATE picking those stupid seeds off. I even considered just trashing the pants (they ARE old).
But I had a thought. I have a hand vac with a rotating brush head. Spreading the pants out flat on the floor, I tried the vac. It worked beautifully. In about 3 minutes, they were completely cleaned of sticky-seeds!!!
Give it a try. Just remember not to empty the collection bag outside where the seeds will sprout... LOL!
So I took a breather every 15 minutes and walked around the yard a bit, which is semi-forest and lots of field weeds. Guess what, those triangular sticky-seed plants are in full seed! I can never remember the name of the plant and I never remember what it looks like, but if they grow where you live, you know the seeds. By the time I was done with the mulch for the day, my pants were coated with 100s of them. I HATE picking those stupid seeds off. I even considered just trashing the pants (they ARE old).
But I had a thought. I have a hand vac with a rotating brush head. Spreading the pants out flat on the floor, I tried the vac. It worked beautifully. In about 3 minutes, they were completely cleaned of sticky-seeds!!!
Give it a try. Just remember not to empty the collection bag outside where the seeds will sprout... LOL!
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Sometimes I am REALLY Dense
Recently, I posted about my frustrations in trying to repair the drip irrigation hoses. I had 4 of them mounted to a 4 gang valve on a 12" post. Two winters ago, the heavy snow broke the drip hoses off the couplings at the gang valve. I became obsessed trying to find an internal connection (like a stent, I suppose) to reattach the hoses to the couplings. I wasn't having any luck, because I needed 7/16" tubing and couldn't find that size anywhere.
One person, seybernetx, suggested standard garden hose repair kits. I dismissed the idea because, well, it wasn't a standard garden hose. Have you ever dismissed an idea because it didn't fit the way you were thinking of a problem? Yeah, me too!
Well, I was walking past the broken drip hoses today, and the old LIGHT BULB OVER THE HEAD lit up! A hose is a hose is a hose... WHY was I caring about the existing brass hose couplings? A standard hose repair kit would work just fine. I had simply assumed the drip hoses were some odd size that wouldn't work with standard hose repair kits!
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb!!!
The hard part is that I am usually quite resourceful about fixing things, using odd unrelated objects to make repairs... I guess this is one of the top 10 list of THINGS I FLUBBED! I even had one of the right size repair kits sitting around. It worked just fine. I just need 3 more from the hardware store tomorrow.
Thank you, seybernetx. And my cats say "hello" to your cats...
One person, seybernetx, suggested standard garden hose repair kits. I dismissed the idea because, well, it wasn't a standard garden hose. Have you ever dismissed an idea because it didn't fit the way you were thinking of a problem? Yeah, me too!
Well, I was walking past the broken drip hoses today, and the old LIGHT BULB OVER THE HEAD lit up! A hose is a hose is a hose... WHY was I caring about the existing brass hose couplings? A standard hose repair kit would work just fine. I had simply assumed the drip hoses were some odd size that wouldn't work with standard hose repair kits!
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb!!!
The hard part is that I am usually quite resourceful about fixing things, using odd unrelated objects to make repairs... I guess this is one of the top 10 list of THINGS I FLUBBED! I even had one of the right size repair kits sitting around. It worked just fine. I just need 3 more from the hardware store tomorrow.
Thank you, seybernetx. And my cats say "hello" to your cats...
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Outdoor Fall Projects
Well, it is raining again today. It must be the rainiest Sept/Oct I have experienced. And that has exploded the mosquito population. Even with deet on my arms and neck, they swarm around my face. They are pretty desperate. Probably because there are so many of them and so few victims outside in suburbia. Really, when I was young, all kids were outside from dawn to dusk except during school. Now, hardly a kid is outside.
And with more pets being cats, and kept indoors, less pets for the skeeters to feed on. I am considering getting my hunting garb mosquito netting headgear out... That may seem extreme, but when the skeeters are biting your face, its not!
I haven't been doing too much outside the past week. The inside of the house needed a lot of cleaning and organizing. And I have that trail-load of mulch to empty...
Project 1 - Empty the trailer of mulch.
Project 2 - Deadhead all the perennial flowers of flowerstems and hang them up for the finches to eat the seeds.
Project 3 - Deepen the drainage ditch from the patio and install real perforated drainage pipe to the downslope area.
Project 4 - Clean the patio of silt and debris.
Project 5 - Protect the patio from rain from the deck above. My idea is to put plastic on the deck and then cover it with outdoor carpet. I plan to rebuild the 20 year old deck in a year or two, so it is a temporary measure. The deck has given its expected lifetime.
Project 6 - Kill the ivy that has taken over the ridge in the backyard. Too awkward to mow, but I cant till it down and spread the soil until the ivy is all dead. The vines wrap around the tiller tines.
THAT should keep me busy for awhile! And I'll try for pictures...
And with more pets being cats, and kept indoors, less pets for the skeeters to feed on. I am considering getting my hunting garb mosquito netting headgear out... That may seem extreme, but when the skeeters are biting your face, its not!
I haven't been doing too much outside the past week. The inside of the house needed a lot of cleaning and organizing. And I have that trail-load of mulch to empty...
Project 1 - Empty the trailer of mulch.
Project 2 - Deadhead all the perennial flowers of flowerstems and hang them up for the finches to eat the seeds.
Project 3 - Deepen the drainage ditch from the patio and install real perforated drainage pipe to the downslope area.
Project 4 - Clean the patio of silt and debris.
Project 5 - Protect the patio from rain from the deck above. My idea is to put plastic on the deck and then cover it with outdoor carpet. I plan to rebuild the 20 year old deck in a year or two, so it is a temporary measure. The deck has given its expected lifetime.
Project 6 - Kill the ivy that has taken over the ridge in the backyard. Too awkward to mow, but I cant till it down and spread the soil until the ivy is all dead. The vines wrap around the tiller tines.
THAT should keep me busy for awhile! And I'll try for pictures...
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