Laughable But Awful Instructions

I "love" 😖 the instructions that come with some equipment.  I have an battery self-propelled Ryobi mower (which I actually do love).  Nice quiet walk-behind and the batteries last pretty long.  Well, some of the lawn was covered deeply in leaves.  I usually just use the riding mower to shred them into the lawn, but I am redoing my compost bin and wanted to add the leaves to it.  

Between the 2 mowers, it looked like the electric one was easiest to attach a collection bag to, so last night I got the parts out of the shed and opened the manual.  There is a metal rod frame and a mesh cover.  The cover has some plastic attachments like slit plastic tubing to hold the bag to the frame.  The instctions were fairly simple.  

Basically, just turn the cover upside down, slide in the frame upside down, and slip the plastic attachments over the frame.   Yeah right!  If the manual was alive, it would have cackled evilly as I read that.  

It took 45 minutes of frustrating effort to do that one simple thing.  I finally had to use a screwdriver as a wedge to pry the attachment open, a plier to squeeze the tubing partly onto the frame, and that was just the first inch!  I needed a clamp to hold that in place while I did the next inch.  There were about 24" in 5 pieces.

When I finally got one section done, I had to use a rubber mallet to really complete the attachment tubing firmly.  I used some BAD WORDS...

I did get better at it on the other sections.  As with most one-time jobs, I was pretty good at it by the time I was done.  If the mesh cover was 1/8th" larger, it would have been so much easier.  I suppose Ryobi saves $1 per cover not adding that 1/8"...  And of course my time and effort is not an expense to them.

I'm sorry I didn't take pictures, but it wouldn't really have shown much of the trouble it was to attach.  Nor would it have been possible most of the time, since I needed both hands to hold everything in place while doing the work.

On the other hand, it was a fine tight attachment when completed, and I won't have to do it again.  I hope the cover lasts as long as the mower.  All that was needed was to attach the collection bag.  But it was dark by then so I decided to tackle that this morning (dreading some complicated troublesome attachment procedure).

So, this morning I took the collection bag and manual to the shed to see how bad that might be.  It went right on as simple as you please!  Lift the back cover of the mower, set the bottom front of the bag on a little ledge on the mower, lift the back slightly, and two 1" rods on the bag frame slip into 2 metal slots on the mower.  

That part was very nicely-designed!  And I will compliment the design for another reason.  There is a carrying hand on the bag frame.  It is placed perfectly.  When I lifted the filled bag off the mower, the bag tilted back slightly as to not spill any of the contents.  Someone had to have done some testing on that!

Tomorrow:  Using the mower on the leaves and getting them to the compost bin...

Yard

The bad news is that I had to have some landscaping cut down earlier this month.  Dead trees, dead shrubs, etc.  There was a dead tree too large for me to handle and remove, so I decided to have some other problems removed at the same time.  Used to look like this...

Those are all gone now...  Drought and windstorms.

The good news is that I can re-landscape the front yard.  Sometimes, it is good to have changes.  Choosing new things to plant will be fun.  They will be more heat and drought tolerant.  I also plan to reduce the lawn area.  I have a mulching mower, so lawn-clippings just stay on the soil a decay.  But grass wants what grass is - itself, so I don't fertilize it madly like some people do.  I give it a "bit" of organic slow-release nitrogen (corn gluten) every couple of years.  Well, some nitrogen escapes over time and the grass needs some replacement.

The mulching mower also shreds the fallen tree leaves.  That adds some bulk to the soil.  When I moved here 36 years ago, the soil would crack open like a dried-up river bed.  After all those years of leaving the grass and leaf clippings in place, the soil is softer, more fertile, and the grass doesn't even go dormant in the Summer.

But a large clear lawn is not my goal.  Sure, I want what there is to be healthy, but I don't need so much of it.  Every few years, I tend to add more islands of flowerbeds and a few shrubs (framed to make mowing easier).  I have to build 3 new ones now where the dead shrubs used to be.

Ideally, the entire front yards would go from "framed islands" to the whole thing with paths.  But I'm getting older gradually (is there any other way?) and maintenance becomes harder.  Well, wherever there are framed beds, I don't have to mow there.  And if I keep paper covered with mulch deep enough in the frames, I don't have to weed there either.  

So I guess I am planning how to make my future (less active) life easier.  Eventually, I won't even need a riding mower.  The self-propelled electric one will do all that it required.  My next car will be all-electric too.  Eventually, I will just have a landscaped yard with paths among the trees, islands, and shrubs.  

Flashback Friday

I use Flashback Friday to show old events on Mark's Mews.  So why not here as well?

I had built 2 landscaping boxes on either side of the front steps. Back in 2009, I had Caladiums on the left and fancy Hostas on the right.  They were gorgeous.  

OK, that year.  Neighbors commented on them.  Then the deer found them...  Hostas are deer-candy.  I have moved most to the backyard where the deer don't try to enter.  They didn't like the Caladiums so much, but Caladiums aren't hardy here.  If you don't dig them up and store the bulbs properly, they are gone.  I didn't get around to that.  I might buy more next Spring for planting elsewhere.

So I converted the Caladium bed to Snow-On-The-Mountain.  I got some from my parents in New Hampshire and deer don't eat them.  They multiplied rapidly and that was good.

But some sprouts went all green and took over.  I'm still fighting to pull those up and get the bed all the variegated type.  But the green ones are hard to kill.  I think I'll have to just dig up the variegated ones and pot them, pulling out any green sprouts.  Then smother the bed over Winter and try to replant next Spring.

I'll put paper over the bed (that stuff used for packing in shipping boxes).  I have a lot of it.  I'll poke holes in it and set the variegated pots in those.  Should give them a better chance to re-establish.

I have 3 dozen Nandina shrubs growing and need to decide where to plant them.  Saved the seeds 3 years ago and they are a foot tall now.  They takes months to germinate.  Deer won't touch them, which is good, and they are evergreen with bright red berries in Winter.  

Mine stay about 4' tall and 3' wide.  I think the edge of the drainage easement would be a good place.  They have strong deep roots (I tried to dig one up once) and would resist occasional drainage flooding.  And since they are evergreen, they make a good yard border.

A lot of Nandina and Hollies would be interesting...

 

Bad Internet Information

 No, this isn't about politics, science non-facts, or social media trolls.  It is about "just plain wrong".

I was watching a political debate from 2 candidates from Pennsylvania the other night and for some odd reason, it occurred to me that I couldn't recall what city was the capital of that State.  I knew it wasn't either of the 2 largest cities.  State capitals are usually not the largest cities.  

That sort of memory-blank bothers me.  Not that I think I'm losing my mind, just that when not recalling basic facts annoys me.  I tried to think likely cities.  I considered Altoona.  When I finally checked, it was Harrisburg.  LOL!

I mention that to mention this.  While looking up the capital of Pennsylvania, I found a site called "World Atlas".  Which one might assume is generally accurate and managed by knowledgeable individuals.  I'll mention that it seems to be a non-US site.  It said the capital of Pennsylvania was Philadelphia.  I checked around other sites and found that wrong.

It also said some 18th century Pennsylvania resident (David Rittenhouse) "discovered" Venus.  OK, that really made me laugh.  Venus was known to the Ancients and some previous astronomers had observed it though telescopes for a couple of centuries.

So I considered that the site might be a humor site like The Onion.  But most of what was there was accurate, lacking any hint of humor or sarcasm.  My best guess is that they were serious about what they wrote.  So, it was like they said the Capital of Russia was Volgograd (formerly Stalingrad).

Looking up "David Rittenhouse", I discovered that he was actually only researching the orbit of Venus by examining its transit across the Sun.  

Where did these "World Atlas" people get their information?  I can only laugh (and shake my head in amazement) at such bad information.  Even legitimate-sounding sites can be astonishingly wrong.  

But I also want to mention (thinking about Venus) what Carl Sagan once said about thoughts on Venus.  And I paraphrase:

1.  Venus has an opaque atmosphere.  You can't see through it with a telescope.  So what did some scientists conclude in the 1800s?

2.  The atmosphere is all clouds.  What makes clouds?  Water.  Venus must be very wet.

3.  If Venus is very wet, it was be mostly swampy.  What grows in swamps?  Ferns.

4.   What eats ferns?  Dinosaurs.  Therefore, Venus must have dinosaurs.

5.  From not seeing anything at all, they concluded there were dinosaurs on Venus!

We now know, from probes and better equipment, that Venus is a desert and the atmosphere is made up of mostly noxious chemicals that would prevent any life as we know it.  Even relatively modern people can think in bizarrely illogical ways.

I'm not exactly blaming them.  I dread to think about some things we currently think to be accurate and logical will seem bizarre to our descendents.  Well, at least I won't be around then to experience the embarrassment!

But, still, that "World Atlas" stuff really cracked me up!

Edited to add:  I just noticed the Weather Channel's "10 Day Forecast" includes 14 days!  ROTFL...

Camo Pants, Finally

 So there I was, in an office.  It was a 90 day temporary position.  We kept records of which office had what furniture and equipment.  Sounds stupid, but it was a law at the time.  But I was good at it.  After 2 weeks, the Boss asked if I wanted to stay.  Well, it was a 20% increase in pay and no holiday work.  DAMN HELL YES!

I "dressed for success".  3 piece navy pinstripe suits, fancy ties, even a pocket watch.  As the Boss told me "dress for the job you want next".  He liked me and I liked him (he could dictate a letter on the fly with a moment's notice on the oddest things).  Funny thing about him was that he was "merely" an ensign in WWII but boss of Officers from then.  I loved it.  And I think he saw the same attitude in me.

I got promoted.  But I have a flaw.  I ask troublesome questions and I'm not very hierarchical.  They say "you have to go along to get along".  I don't.  So there eventually came a point where I wasn't going to be promoted ever again.  I mean, I argued with the CEO and CFO, and that is never a big career move. 

But I really liked my job, so that was OK.  And realizing that, I decided I didn't have to "dress for success" anymore.   The first thing to go was the shiny leather shoes.  My feet hurt all the time.  I was one of the first office workers to wear "sensible shoes".  Second to go was the navy&tan outfit.  I always hated that combination.

So, following some heroes of mine, I became "The Man In Black".  Well, it was distinguishing and also identified me as a "techie".  And it is hard to mismatch "black".  I was clever user at computers, but never really a "techie".  The black clothes helped the image.  Sad as it may seem, Management reacts to the way you  dress.  And they don't argue with "techies" much.  Tech stuff is out of their realm.  

So I retired the first day I could.  I hated the hour-long commute.  And I was away from The Mews 12 hours a day.  Basically, I was involved at work and commuting 12 hours each workday.  Had to make dinner and do household chores, play with the cats and go to bed in 4 hours.

Retirement was an "escape".  Every promotion I got, half the gain went into stocks.  My needs are cheap.  The retirement annuity itself was sufficient; the stocks were gravy.

And THAT  is when I went into camo pants.  You knew I would get there eventually, right?

Utterly non-office dress.  Completely the opposite of office wear.  A rebellion against the years of "dressing for success" to suggest to bosses that I was worthy of promotions (regardless of merit as so many others got promoted).  I was free.

So "camo pants man" I became.  And I do like the look.  I was a bow-deer-hunting guy in my teens and 20s and always appreciated it then.  And I returned to that after retirement.  I don't mean for a moment to suggest I was in camo as some sort of "military" wanna-be, just that I liked the idea of slipping into the woods and not being noticed much (even if it is just my own backyard).

So, next week, I will have many brand-spanking-new camos of several colors (with hats to match, LOL).  And nice solid black or green shirts to wear with them.  

That's my "camo pants" story...  If you read this stuff to the end, you deserve a graphic badge:

Department Stores Actually

Camo actually comes next time.  I have to provide the backup story first...

My first real job was at a department store.  I had a small aquarium and wanted some additional fish.  The pet department at the store had a lot of community-oriented fish.  But I was offended at seeing so many dead fish in the tanks and complained about that to the guy at the desk (I'm a talented complainer about inhumane conditions, apparently).  

Turned out he was the Department Manager and asked if I wanted a job.  Being a broke college student (broker than a bad French poet), I accepted.  I spent 3 months getting the aquaria cleaned.  By that time, he got fired for incompetence, and the Assistant Manager (and I) took over.  She quit a few months later and I was left in charge by default.  

Ruined my college efforts; but real money in my pocket was too hard to resist.  I really fixed up the place.  I set up displays of breeding tanks of Bettas and Gouramis.  I set up a display (using a 2 gallon brandy snifter I stole from housewares) to show that guppies and live plants could form a self-sustaining system (back in 1972).  

Sales doubled.  The Regional Manager (department stores were then called "departments" because each sales "department" was actually a company that just rented space from the store - I have no ideas how it works today).  I got praise.  I got bonuses.  But after a year, the company decided to shut down in Maryland.  The Regional Manager offerred me the management of their top department.  But it was in New Jersey, and I was still trying to get my college degree.  I declined.  I sometimes wonder how different my life would have been had I accepted.

So the store offerred me a job as a security guard at the loading dock.  BORING AS HELL!  My job was just to make sure truckers didn't steal stuff back into their trucks.  One day, the Manager of the auto after-market department (spark plugs, anti-freeze, oil) asked the loading dock Manager if he knew anyone who could become his Assistant Manager.  

I jumped up and raised my hand, explaining my experience.  He decided I was a better choice than an advertizement, so I got the job.  I excelled there too.  Then the whole store went bust!  I went through a couple other department stores.  I was even in charge of 1/4th of one before I realized there was no future in it.  In charge of 1/4th the store meant I got 10 cents above minimum wage.  And had to work all holidays.  I got tired of that.

A friend suggested I take the US Civil Service Exam.  I did, and scored 100 in all 5 sections.  Got me a job at an Agency I had never heard of.  Turns out I was really good at office work.  And the pay was better.

I eventually became the Voice Telecommunications Manager and retired happily the first day I was eligible.

I'll explain about the camo pants next post (really)...

Clothes Alterations

OK, so I was at a local dry cleaner's shop to have some new-bought pants shortened.  There is the line to pick up or bring clothes to be dry-cleaned and there is a seperate desk for alterations.  I stand at the alterations desk a few minutes and people in the dry-cleaning line are staring.  

I get the message and ask a clerk if the line is for both.  It is.  Not anywhere else I've ever been, but it is here.    

So I leave the box at the alterations desk and stand in line politely.  8 people in line and giving or picking up dry-cleaning is not a fast operation.  *sigh*.  A guy enters the alterations area and paws at my box.  I run up and explain my request.  He tells me the price (which was fine), but I have to go stand in the line.  OK, I'm retired; no problem with some time.

15 minutes later, I get service.  The clerk says (about alterations) "well, you just should have said so".  ARGGHHH!  But she processes my order.  I'm a new customer (obviously, I wouldn't go there a 2nd time) and she needs information about me.  My phone number is a problem; it is not a smartphone and they want to text me when the alterations are complete.  I say "just call me" but that is apparently not part of their process.  She finally figures out how to make the computer tell them to "just call me".

I'm annoyed.  The alterations cost as much as the pants.  I'm used to that.  I'm not "normal" (family of short-legged people).  From the waist down, I should be 5' 2".  From the waist up, I should be 5' 10". So, I'm 5' 7".   I researched that once...  So my inseam is 25".  No one sells anything less than 30".  I'm used to that, but it still aggravates me.  😩

Why  was I having 8 pairs of pants to shorten, you ask?  Because sometimes I buy stuff and forget about them.  My favorite pants are "woodland camo".  I spent too many years wearing the standard men's office wear of beige pants and a medium blue shirt, navy blazer and tie.  So, being retired, I think "camo" is nice.  

And mine are so old and faded they just looked "smudgy greenish".   So I bought 4 new ones (even a blue camo and a desert camo!).  After they arrived, I discovered I had done the same thing a year ago, setting them in a box for alterations.  So I had 8 camo pants to get shortened.

I almost have to laugh at the (imagined) view of a professional tailor shortening blue camo pants to a 25" inseam.  "What is the Navy coming to, to have such weirdly-shaped people" he must wonder.  Well, my choice of clothes may be a bit weird, but it is my own.  I am retired and single; I don't have to answer to anyone.  And the cats don't care.  😄

They (the dry-cleaners, not the cats) will call me in about a week.

Which leads me to my next annoyance (closet-hangers), but that's the next post...

A Minor Computer Win

1.  I bought a color toner printer 2 years ago.  I don't print often, so the old color ink-jet printer cartridges dried up before being used up.  And at $50 for a whole set of cartridges was annoying.  I read that toner lasts forever, so I bought one.

It has been difficult to use.  Apparently, it is intended for multiple user office use.  I did not know that at the time.  It has many functions and setting designed for office use and you almost have to be an IT person to understand them.  Just getting it to merely print seemed like an insult to it.

I succeeded (sometimes, after struggling), but never knew why.  A few days ago, I wanted to print out my vaccine record (flu, covid and others) from a govt website.  I could NOT make the darn printer print.  I searched all over the commands and settings, to no avail.  

But I noticed one setting that said "network".  I unclicked it.  IMMEDIATELY, it printed out my document. Glory and Hallelujah,  all I had to be was just "myself and no other users".   Two years fighting with it and one click solved it all!

2.  I have a really nice keyboard (dasKeyboard).  The letters seem slightly embossed.  I wear out certain letters on standard keyboards fast, so I appreciate that.  But it uses 2 ports and I struggle with that.  I have an added multiport connector

Not this one, but one like it...  Even that didn't allow all my cables.  But it works for devices not used all at the same time.  So I unplugged the 2 port keyboard from the direct computer connection and moved it to the multi-port.  Obviously, it worked.  And I even (somehow) have a free port.  I haven't figured out the "why" of that yet.

But Yay!  😎

Two problems solved in one day.  Now, if I could get Safari autofill to work, I would be thrilled...

Yardwork And Pains

A couple of weeks ago, I had a tree service remove some dead or troublesome growths and grind the stumps and some roots.  I had them leave the grindings in place so I could add them to my compost bins.

The posts on the back are counterweights to make lifting the tops effortless.  I have since added latches on the front to thwart raccoons and ropes on the sides to pull the tops back down.  The boards on the front are in slots for removal to get at the material more easily.  The backs and sides are framed with 1/4" wire mesh.  It is my own design, and I am insufferably pleased with it.  Mike McGarth (a former editor of Organic Gardening magazine) saw the pictures and declared it "the best compost bins I have ever seen". 

That's not the point of this post, though (I just thought I should explain the picture).  And it was time to move the contents from one bin to the other for aeration and mixing.

Yesterday, I finally got around to shoveling the stump and root grindings into buckets.  Those Tidy Cat 35# litter tubs are sturdy and useful!  I have about 2 dozen of them.  I tried using the shop vac to pick the grinding up, but they clogged the hose.  So, it was rake and shovel work.

I filled most of the buckets.  I dumped the grindings, saved dry grass clippings (from a trash barrel), and kitchen waste (from one bin) to the other in 4" layers.  The one bin of kitchen scraps was filled with roots from the neighbor's "junk" trees.  Wow, I was feeding the very trees that shade my garden!  Really annoying; I'll have to find a sneaky way to kill those things...

The new, better, mix should produce compost faster and I'm happy about that.  

But even that isn't the point of this post.

I took out my small electric tiller and mixed the remaining stump sawdust with the soil.  You can't grow grass in pure wood grindings; they pull all the nitrogen from the soil while decaying.   The tiller is easy to use.  I have to stop every so often to remove wound up roots and grass, but that is easier than dragging out the big gas-powered one for small areas.  

The point is that I spent 4 hours holding tools.  I knew I was going to pay for that later (and I did).  I get finger-clenches from gripping things too long.  It's both painful and awkward.  Try preparing dinner sometime when you can't hold a knife!  Makes typing darn near impossible, too.  And the constant hand tremors (DDT exposure as a teen) don't make things any easier.  It makes my "hunt&peck" typing "huntier&peckier", LOL!  In fact, I tried to post this last night and couldn't.

Mom had finger-clenches too, but from Parkinson's in her 80s.  She acted as if it was more "cosmetic" that painful at the time, but I know better now.  I don't think I have that (yet), but the effect is the same.  Muscle ointments like Aspercreme and gels with ladocaine help but they take a while and cease working after a couple hours.

But at least I did get the grinded stuff removed, the areas tilled and raked level, and ready for grass seed.  Yeah, is is a bit late for seeding, but I have the seeds and they won't last forever (already a year old) so I might as well try.  I'll give them a dusting of slow-release nitorogen fertilizerGrass is tough stuff when it germinates, and the forecast doesn't suggest a frost in the next 2 weeks.  I might cover the spots with clear plastic for protection from cold nights (and birds).

Darn, those finger-clenches are troublesome.  And later come the leg and rib muscle cramps in bed.  Sometimes it feels like the muscles will pull off the bones!  I have to get up (not easy while the legs are cramping) and walk around the house 15-30 minutes until it stops.

I'm not comparing that to more serious medical/bodily problems.  Things could be a lot worse! I am relatively lucky about bodily ills.  But sufficient to the day are the pains of the day and I hate mine.

But I will still keep doing yardwork and other things that cause problems afterward for as long as I am able.  And I suppose that is the point of this post.

Thank you for reading this to the end...  😁

Meadow And Pollinator Beds

 You may recall that I decided to establish a 30'x15' Meadow Garden and a separate 10' diameter Pollinator Garden in the back yard several years ago.  Both have failed.  I got great results at first from broadcasting seed mixes on the newly-tilled soil.  The annuals did well.  But the perennials never got established.

The 2nd year, scattering thistle seeds in one and saved marigold seeds in the other produced a flush of flowers in each, but those were also annuals.  Nothing grew the next season.

I was disappointed, of course.  It is my fault.  I always try to do things too quickly.  I should have covered the beds for a season after tilling to smother all weeds before I planted anything.  I am impatient sometimes.

This past Spring, I ordered a selection of potted assorted self-sowing meadow flowers from Prairie Moon Nursery.  They are a quality nursery and no blame to them.  I planted them according to instructions but saw no flowers this year.  But I had labels for each in front of each transplant.

A slight aside, I planted seeds of Maltese Cross and Butterfly Weed (a dryland type of Milkweed) elsewhere 2 years ago (where I had smothered the weeds for a year) and this year, most bloomed.  So sometimes it takes a couple of years for some perennials.

With that in mind, I mowed the Meadow Bed just above label height.  I crawled through the bed carefully on hands and knees, searching for labels.  I found 32 of 38 labels and marked each with a landscaping flag.

I'll find the other 6 when the frost kills the weeds and they decay over Winter.  Then, I'll put a 10"x10" slotted holed cardboard (I have cardboard from some stuff I order regularly) around each plant to keep the weeds away.  That should give them a good chance to grow.  Most of the meadow plants grow 3-4' so (once established), they can shade out the grass.  Well, that's why there are flower-filled meadows in some places rather than just grass.

And knowing where the flowers are will allow me to cover much of the spaces between them with that 2' wide brown paper often used as packing material by shippers.  I save it and must have about 1,000' folded and stashed.

The Pollinator bed has nothing useful growing in it.  I mowed it as short as possible yesterday and will transplant the Butterfly Weed and Maltese Cross in a couple of weeks when they go dormant.  I'll add a few pollinator-friendly annuals next Spring.  Maybe get a few different perennial pollinator-friendly seedlings too.  Some good ones are just difficult to start as seeds.  So I will leave the seed-starting to the professionals and pay for actual plants.  Once established, they are basically self-sowing.

I am determined to make both beds succeed!