email: cavebear2118 AT verizon DOT com

Privacy Notice: About Cookies

This blog site uses cookies from Google and from Stat Counter to analyze visitor traffic. Your IP address along with your city, state and country are recorded. The European Union General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR) requires this notice.

Tuesday, August 8, 2017


A little dark humor...

Kim Jong Un and Donald Trump are on the telephone reluctantly "diplomacizing"...

Kim:  You attack us, The Greatest of Nations, and we will level Seoul with our mightly artillery!
Trump:  Yawn, not our problem...

Kim:  We will atomic bomb Guam!
Trump:  Is that ours?  Well, hold on 30 seconds...  OK, I just sold it to the Japanese.

Kim:  Then we will nuke California!
Trump:  Go ahead, it's all Democrats.  Besides, it's only our 10th biggest State.  Besides, you probably couldn't hit it.

Kim:  Well we'll hit SOMETHING!
Trump:  Sure go ahead.  You'll kill a bunch of Mexicans picking grapes in Napa Valley.  Then I won't need a wall at all...

Kim:  But think of the destruction!
Trump.  Actually, we have laser satellites.  You won't get a missile into reentry.  Wait, hold on 30 seconds, Bannon is yelling in my ear.  OK, he says I shouldn't have told you that.  Forget I mentioned it.

Kim, Then I will send a nuke in a container ship!
Trump:  Go for San Fransisco, thats where all the LBGTQIAs are.

Kim:  WHO?
Trump:  Google it.  Oh wait, you don't have internet there, HA, HA, HA!

Kim:  I will send an skilled Korean assassin to work at Mar-A-Lago!
Trump:  I only hire Mexicans, no matter what South American country they come from! 

 Kim:  Then I will post a sniper in the woods of your golf course.  You slice terribly!  He will know just where to wait.
 Trump:  That's a body double.  I have a dozen.  I'll put a bomb in Dennis Rodman's basketball next time he visits you.  BOOM!

Kim:  You would blow up the Great Dennis Rodman?
Trump:  In a NY second.  He has better hair than I do.

Kim:  Then I will nuke Japan!
Trump:  Please do, that will improve our tech industry profits.  But as a favor, do it while Rodman is there on his way to visit you.  Two birds with one stone.

Kim:  OK, I would never nuke Japan or anyplace where Dennis Rodman is...
Trump:  I know.  Well, guess who just got named the Ambassador to Everywhere, travelling secretly and with 100 body-doubles in all embassies ...  GOTCHA!

Kim:  Dennis Rodman HAS no body doubles!
Trump:  You haven't been following the South Korean DNA experiments lately, have you?

Kim:  I thought he was a ET!
Trump:  You watch too many movies.  BTW, we have The Avengers and they have The Hulk.

Kim:  Well, um, I think you are weak.  I can pole vault 32', run a 3 minute mile, I shoot par golf, and, um,  throw a shotput 60'.  My Secretary-General of My Athletic Skills says so!  Or at least will tomorrow.
Trump:  Yeah, I have one of those too.  I can throw a football in a tight spiral through a swinging tire, hit a baseball 500', and have a 0 handicap at golf!

Kim:  Really?
Trump:  Of course really!  Would I lie to you?  Come to Mar-A-Lago anytime and I'll prove it.

Kim:  Sorry, I'm busy that week.
Trump:  Well ANYTIME is fine, I play golf all over the country at my 100's of resorts.  On government time and cost.  Name a day...

Kim:  Sorry but I am an booked up through 2025.  Really busy here.

Trump:  Well, yeah me too.

Kim:  (Whew, escaped that exposure)
Trump:  (Whew, escaped that exposure)

Kim:  You are insane!
Trump:  Funny, I was just thinking that about you.

Kim:  You have ugly hair!
Trump:  My hair is HONORED on the internet!  Have you seen the "Trump Your Cat" pictures?  It show they love me.  Hugely!  Beat that...

Kim:  You're FAT.  Too much hamburgers and french fries.
Trump:  Not much to look at yourself.  What are you?  4' 6" and 225 pounds?  I bet you don't get there on just rice.

Kim:  I am the most well-fed person in the country.  I am 7' tall and a trim 250!
Trump:  I'm 6'6" and 275.  Won the Presidential Wrestling Competition in 2016!

Kim:  Really?
Trump:  Would I lie to YOU?

Kim:  You know, you are an interesting person.
Trump:  Yeah, we think alike.

Kim:  Maybe we could exchange some emails.
Trump:  I'm more on Twitter, but emails might be good...  I'll ask Hillary how that works...

Together:  "I want you, I need you, I love you"

1 comment:

Megan said...

Funny - but also worrying!

Sydney, Australia