A Little Political Humor

I'm a bit of a political nerd, so I hope these make sense (and I like VP Biden a lot)...


If VP Joe Biden became President in 2016...

1.  "Air Force One" would be a train.  To Delaware.
2.  Late night comedians would surge in the Neilson Ratings.  Joe is a constant source of gaffes.
3.  His White House Security name would be "VEEP".
4.  He would be conciliatory; he likes both chocolate AND vanilla ice cream on his cones.
5.  The official White House drink would be a non-tini (Joe doesn't drink alcohol).
6.  New national food craze - PASTA.  Joe loves pasta.
7.  Hillary appointed New York State dog-catcher.
8.  Then appointed Supreme Court Chief Justice (because Joe is a Nice Guy).
9.  National Capital moved to Wilmington Delaware ("Weekly Air Force One Train transporatation costs too high, says POTUS Biden").
10. Republicans announce support for Biden, "he's Our Kind Of Guy - white, male, and old" they declare.
11.  Southern Republicans go step further, "He's darn near a 'good ole boy' they say".
12.  Political partisanship ends, criminals reform, cancer is cured, Mars colony established, Al Gore retroactively recognized as 43rd President.  Bill Clinton resigns as VP to make room for Gore.
13 Vulcans arrive and invite Earth to join the Federation.  Bill Clinton elected World Representative.  Putin reduced to attacking neighboring nations in Risk Tournaments only.  Republicans disband party...

Next Project, Part 2

Made some progress on framing in the area around the sunken patio wall and deck posts the past to days.  It's a bit awkward using just the deck leftovers, but I think I have them arranged so that I don't have to dig really deep trenches to set the boards into the ground.

The lower end needs a 2"x12" board and a 2"x10" board to reach the top on the cinder block wall, but the far end is almost level with the wall, so I only need a 2"x4" board.  The in-between part will have a couple of stacked boards to complete the frame and make it level on the top of the boards.  And I can attach those directly to the deck posts, so it will be very sturdy.

I had some problems figuring out how to attach the lower end boards firmly, until I thought of drilling holes down the width at both ends.  I can put a 3' remesh bar through both and pound them into the ground with a sledgehammer.  That will have the remesh bars 1' into the ground.  Plus I will use some exterior caulking cement to attach the boards to the cinder block for some extra stability.  It's not epoxy or resin, just like really thick toothpaste.  I'm not sure what that stuff is actually called, but I've used it before to attach wood and cinder block in the basement and it holds like bolts!

Drilling the holes through the width of the 12 and 10" boards took 2 hours today!  Fortunately, I have a large drill press (generic image).  With some clamps and a speed square, I was able to get most on the holes drilled straight. 

But it won't go all the way through a 12' board (8" depth only).  So I had to finish the drilling manually.  Fortunately, having the 8 inch holes drilled straight allowed me to use a manual drill for the rest.  The drilled holes allowed me to stay straight for the final work.  But I couldn't have done THAT without the extra long drill bit.

I bought a 6-piece set of extra long drill bits many years ago thinking "I'll need those some day".  They're not the best quality either.  Not titanium or even high-speed steel, but how often do you need something like those?  So they were cheap and they work well enough.  Just using a couple of the cheap drill bits a couple of times has been well worth the cost.

It took some work though!  Every inch deep, I had to pull the drill bit out and remove sawdust packed in the drill spirals.  Could I have simply turned the boards over on the drill press and drilled from both sides?  Yeah.  But experience has taught me that no matter how carefully you measure, holes drilled from 2 sides will NEVER meet in the middle.  Sad but true.  You need factory precision tools to do that.

But that part is now done.  Tomorrow, I will attach the bottom pieces by pounding rebar through the holes and gluing the ends to the cinder block.  Then it will be a lot easier to trench the long side boards and attach them to the deck posts.

Filling in the framed box will be easy.  Why?  Well, the yard is made of dirt; I can steal it from almost anywhere, LOL!  I'm going to move the front yard hostas to the new box, and hostas don't even LIKE really good soil.

One interesting thing is that the hostas will be almost at eye level when I'm out on the sunken patio.  I used to park at a city garage that had an arrangement like that, and it was really different seeing the plants that way.  It was always calming.  So I'm hoping for the same effect here.

Surprise discovery...  The new deck posts are set precisely 14' away from the house.  But the distance from the sunken patio cinder block wall varies by 6".  The cinder block wall is NOT square to the house!  Every project I do reminds me that the builder did a slipshod job in all aspects.  So the framed box is not going to be a nice rectangle. 

But it was either make the framed box a 90 degree rectangle (in which case the deck posts would have been variably farther inside the frame, or use the deck posts as the guide for the frame and the frame gets 6" narrower toward the high end.  I decided that using the deck posts as a guide made a more logical appearance.

If any of my friends ever decide to measure it, I will rap their knuckles with a ruler!  LOL!

Some notes from the first picture...  1) At the far side of the sunken patio, there are some hostas already planted.  I had one common green hosta planted near the old deck stairs for 20 years and it spread some.  I was able to divide it into 12 pieces and transplanted them there.  All seem to be recovering well in that really terrible clay soil.  Well, its what they were growing in before, so I assume they liked it. 

2) That object in the upper right is a mailbox.  Of course, I don't get my mail delivered in the back yard.  But it makes a great place to store all my various garden hose nozzles and plumbers tape*.  I have another out in the garden where I store all my small hand tools.  Great idea to keep track of small items...

* Plumbers tape is thin plastic that wraps around the threads of hoses and attachments.


 It does a great job of stopping water leaks around hose and nozzle connections.  Leaky connections?  Give it a try.  $1 at most hardware stores.

Energy Reduction Quote

I received the company's fixed price quote today.  Interesting reading...  I have some questions about some of their measurements and proposed actions.  They want to meet with me personally to discuss the proposal, but I prefer to do it by email.

I always prefer to take company salespeople out of their comfort zone (talking a lot off the record).  Responding to email questions, they have to answer the questions and I have the email to read and re-read a few times to make sure I see what they are evading (if anything).  And it gives me time to consider more questions.

For example, I've noticed they over-estimated my current annual bill by 20% (and I showed them my last 12 month bills),  they overestimated my "conditioned" (meaning heated and cooled) residential square footage (added in my unheated garage as a "conditioned" area), added an extra exhaust fan to be sealed, etc.

So I will compose a list of questions for them to answer.  They should be pleased.  Their salesperson is 30 minuted away from me and planned a 30 minute visit to explain the quote.  I'm helping them do it in about 10 minutes.  Yes, I'm being a bit sarcastic...  I was a salesman once and know the value of talking face-to-face, sliding around questions, and not have anything in writing except the actual contract (with all the fine print).

Mostly, I know what works for ME.  I bought my last car by email, and it sure saved me a lot of time AND money.  No sitting around while the salesman pretends to "see if I can get the Manager to go for this low deal".  And with everything in writing, there were no "little surprise add-ons" afterwards.  I got the car for $500 above the dealers actually cost (according to the Consumer Reports Car Report I bought for $12).  And the car will be 10 years old In October.  So I like negotiating at a distance.

Back to the energy savings quote...  The total quote is for $5100 (with a $2000 subsidy from my electrical supplier bringing it to $3100).  The estimated savings is about 30% (in line with what I've found at seemingly neutral internet sites about such projects.  My last year energy cost was almost $3000, so that means  $900 per year and a payback of just under 3.5 years.  And that's assuming energy costs don't rise (and they will) so it will be closer to a 3 year payback.

After I get them to make some reductions in their quote, and given their Angieslist "A" rating on both quality of work AND price, I think I will just have them do the work without getting competitive bids.  And there are a few smaller cost-effective things I can do myself...

28 Year Old House Renovation Plans

I've sure been doin some research and talking to contractors (and checking with subsidy programs from my electrical supplier lately)!  I have pages of notes.  And I am darn near worn out just trying to combine all the possibilities.

The various contractors all promise 30% energy use reductions in just a few years.  Well, if I believed them all, I wouldn't be paying ANYTHING for electricity or water in just 3 years.  R I I G H T !

The electrical supplier site suggests I can reduce my bill 30-50% with 5-8 year paybacks.  The Govt  sites say about the same.  Those seem more reasonable and trustable.  So I could save $1,000-$1500 per year by spending $8,000 now.  Seems reasonable.

The best savings seem to come from...

1.  Attic blown insulation (gaining from R-12 to R-49).
2.  Attic baffles directing outside soffit heat to the roof vent.
3.  Basement blown insulation.
4.  Expanding/Sealant around the the attic and basement edges.
5.  Having the ducts scraped clean to improve air flow.
6.  Installing a low blow attic fan.
7.  Having the existing heat pump tuned.

An almost none of that was what I expected when I started to investigate this.  I thought it would be all new triple-pane windows and door weatherstripping!

I've learned otherwise...  Its all about proper insulation.  The standard batted stuff is crap.  It never fits tightly, and it never does the job.  But it is cheap for the builders and looks good.

My house is totally electric.  The average bill is $220 per month.  Which isn't horrible.  But if I stay here 10 years (and I probably will), I could save a few thousand $ in some simple ways.  Items 1-4 +6 seem like the way to go for me. 

But I'm still having a few geothermal companies come by for estimates.  That could save LOTS in 20 years.  More a selling point than an advantage I will see.  But I may stay here long enough, so who knows?  And I like the idea, personally and ideologically.

Thursday 13

You Are In Late Middle Age When...

1.  You go out to call all the cats in at dusk and they line up at the deck door.  From INSIDE!

2.  You read a comic strip about twerking and your not quite sure what they are talking about.

3.  You research something on the internet and you realize you are following links in a circle after seeing the same one a third time.

4.  The Houdini wine bottle cork screw remover "works" but you have to take the cork off the screw manually.

5.  You side with all the middle-aged comic strip characters and only "sort of" get the joke.

6.  You don't listen to your old CDs any more.  The songs are all earworms anyway.

7.  You get out of bed in the morning wondering which joint will "feel odd" when your feet hit the floor.

8.  You go to bed not because you are tired, but because you are bored.

9.  You buy some sports thing because "I used to do that".

10. You keep product boxes in the attic because you might move and they would be perfect for packing those things up.  And you threw those products away 10 years ago.

11. You haven't gone out to celebrate New Years Eve because, well, who wants to stay up that late, really?

12. Conversely, you decide that celebrating New Years Morning really makes more sense.

13. You make lists about being Late Middle Aged...

Next Project

I haven't forgotten about the chicken wire garden enclosure, but I'm trying to find a rentable trencher machine to do the hard work.  Now rush now; its late in the garden season, so anything I built will be for next year.  And I've adjusted so  that I have some veggies growing in the flowerbed areas usually reserved for flowers. 

I'm calling it a semi-lost season.  I do have some nice tomatoes growing.

And I dug out an old flowerbed where nothing much was growing to plant cukes and flat italian beans.  I've stuck 4 bell peppers around too.  I'll get by this year.

But since I have to wait a week for the quote of the house air leakage job, I'm on to a new project that I can do fast.

The sunken patio has walls (duh, "sunken") but the lawn slopes sideways to it.  And the new deck posts are 3' beyond the patio walls.  Looks like a great place to plant shade-loving plants if I frame it so that it is leveled.

That's one reason I took pieces of "junk" deck wood aside.  There are 3' pieces of 2"x12" boards which can frame the lowest end and 2"x6" boards that will work the long ways.  Don't worry about the details, just accept it means I can box a sloped area with free leftovers.

And since the deer have discovered my front yard hostas (after almost 10 years) and eaten all the leaves, it is time to change them out for deer-resistant plants (and I have a perfect one - more below).  So where do the front yard hostas go?  Well, in the new framed area I am making, shaded by the deck of course!  Every problem has an elegant solution waiting to be discovered.

The front yard box will become Snow On The Mountain (a variegated 12" tall foliage groundcover that loves shade) and daffodils (neither of which deer eat).  The hostas will be moved to the back yard which has a 6' fence the local deer have never jumped over.

Pictures later as I assemble the framed bed and move the hostas.

Always try to do something useful every day...

My House Is Leaky

I mentioned Friday that I had an energy inspector visit to see if I had sufficient problems to justify my electrical supplier subsidizing a further more detailed test  surprise, surprise, I did).  So a guy came by today to do a "negative air blower test" and examine all the rooms with an infrared camera to identify hotspots.

The air blower test was neat.  He opened the front door, sealed the opening, and turned on a large fan to pull air in from outside the house.  The pressure difference inside shows how much leakage there is.

While that was going on, he went from room to room taking pictures (I assume) to show where the hotspots were as outside air was being pulled into the house through gaps.  He showed me the camera display, and I have to admit there were many places that quickly got hotter in the places that one should expect.

I will be getting a fixed quote from the company in about a week.  From what the initial inspector suggested, the usual fixes are baffles in the attic that direct outside air from the roof soffits up to the roof ridge vent, additional blown-in insulation, expanding foam sealant around attic and basement beams and vent pipes.  The quote should also have a secondary section of things I can do or arrange myself (and that they will do if I choose) like an attic exhaust fan, new water heater.

I think this is all legitimate, though it isn't the kinds of things I can verify myself.  The company is part of an energy savings program sponsored (and subsidized) by my electrical supplier, they have a top rating on Angieslist, and the electrical supplier has previously advised me that I use more electricity than neighbors in similar houses.

I asked about window leakage (through the glass and around the frames).  He mentioned that the  EPA (Environmental Protection Agency for my non-US readers) has a list of most common energy losses.  They are in order; gaps, insufficient insulation, inefficient heating/airconditioning units, old water heaters, incandescent lights, windows, and large TVs.  I plan to replace the windows and old water heater anyway.  And he replaced (for free - subsidized by my electrical supplier) all my incandescent bulbs with compact fluorescent ones.  I had already switched many fixtures to CFLs or LEDs where they stayed on for long times, but free ones for the rest was great.  There are even 3-way CFLs now.

He mentioned something else that really surprised me.  It is recommended by the EPA that 30% of the house air be replaced each hour, so even if they could seal the place up completely, it isn't healthy.  But 30% per hour?  WOW!  I would have guessed "per day".  Well, I guess that's why the house doesn't smell of cooked food and cat litter boxes all the time...

I plan to take the work proposal (to be received next week) to another highly rated company and ask for a similar quote.

One nice note...  Before the guy sealed the front door for the air pressure test, he pointed out that he could see light around the door (meaning leakage).  Well, I did know that myself and had put some weatherstrip along the outside of the door.  It was an odd kind that went on the frame outside the door, and I don't think it works very well.  I need the kind that goes between the door and the frame.

But the neat thing was that, when he assembled his door sealer for the air pressure test, he said that it should measure all the house leakage.  And I said "Well except for around that door".  He turned and looked at me, smiled, and said that I was the first homeowner he had met that had "caught" that. 

Well, I can't wait to see the work quote...

Computer Games - Risk

This will only make much sense if you play strategic computer games...

I'm either getting better at playing Risk (against real people, not the computer robots) or I am lucky.  Tonight, when I signed in, Pogo.com was offerring 2,000 free tokens (good for something, I'm sure - I'll have to look into that) for winning 2 games in 2 weeks.  That may seem easy, but with many obsessed players with multi-millions of points, that's hard for us more ocassional players.

But I'm willing to put my mind (game sense) against almost anyone (seriously, after a million points, how much better can anyone get?)

I needed to win 2 games in 2 weeks.  I played 4 games tonight and won 2!  I was stunned.  Thrilled too, but stunned.  The lowest rated player (other than me)  had 3 times my points.  Some of them had so many points you couldn't even read them because of the allowed space for their names.

So I had a really good night playing Risk.  Everyone should have a good day or night at SOMETHING, once in a while.

I'm not sure what to do with these tokens I've won.  I think you just make your displayed profile fancier.  I already have my avatar dressed in camo and an animated orange/white cat (Marley) licking his paws at my feet.  What could be better than that?  That's my life.

Maybe I can add more cats (Ayla and Iza).  And some background.  I bet they don't offer gardens as backgrounds.

I play Trivial Pursuit there too.  Kill it.  As long as it is not "Actors & Actresses".  I don't watch movies.

Should I try try out for 'Jeopardy'?

Interesting Day, Part 2

So after the "energy inspector" left yesterday, I had other things to do.

First, there was yet one more form to get notarized about Dad's death.  Dad had 4 investment accounts and life insurance (and 2 days retirement pay), which all required some forms (several of which needed bank manager legal signatures and stamps).  So I had all but the last one signed, copied and filed.  The last was just a Notary stamp, and I had the envelope all filled out (just needing the one last page stamped).

I got that, went straight to the post Office (they were all oversize envelopes of 6-10 pages, so I couldn't just stick an extra stamp on them).  OK, that's all done. 

I'm conflicted.  I don't need the money (I've been fortunate to have done well enough myself).  But I'm grateful to Dad for having accumulated it over his life and I appreciate my portion of his life's savings.  And he knew from our financial discussions over the years that I was doing well. 

So I'm going to increase my giving to charitable organization that I think help the world best.  I'm not naming specific ones, but world hunger, world medical treatments, and the general environment are high on my list.  And there will be a local cat no kill-shelter (Southern Maryland suggestions are invited).

After getting home, I planted leeks among the corn.  There's enough sunlight around the base of the corn for the leeks to thrive.  It was nice to get some dirt under my fingernails!  I have the corns planted about 8" apart in bins (its an experiment), but I figure the small space the leeks require won't bother the corn.  SCORE!

And then I wanted to get my garden mailbox re-installed.  I use 2 mailboxes in the yard to store small tools.  One is in the garden itself (for hand tools).  The other is at the deck for hose nozzles and attachments.  This one was the latter.  The old attachment had been poorly constructed and a bit off level.  I fixed that today, and attached it to the center post of the new deck absolutely level. SCORE!

They I decided to hang the niger thistle-seed finch-feeder from the center of the deck.  But there were 3 deck posts and only 2 long hangers.  So I need a third.  But I did have the 2 to install, so I did that.  And in honor of the new deck, I did it RIGHT!

I set one about balanced sideways on the post and clamped it loosely.  I have this neat tool that gives an analog dial red at any angle.  Old but accurate.  I clamped the hanger in about the center and level position, then measured it side to side.  I attached a screw at the bottom, then adjusted the position of the hanger to be level and clamped it tight.  Set in another screw at the top (pilot hole for accuracy and all that ease of screwing).  Perfect.  Now I just have to plant some appropriate flowers in the baskets to be hung. 

After THAT, I dug up weeds around the tomatoes and the bell peppers I planted.  They are all doing well.

By tht time, it was getting near dark out.  I called the cats in.  They get kibbles as treats when the come in when called.  Dinner was a smoked half steak sliced thin with carmelized onion, red bell pepper, green bell pepper, and crimini mushrooms (cheaper lately than regular white mushrooms), bean beans, tossed salad, and M/V potato.

Games

This was actually 3 days ago, but I have some posts scheduled and its just too confusing to go back and change the tenses of those.  So I'm writing this today in the present tense, but you are reading this a few days from now.  With that out of the way...

I play games of all sorts.  Board games, not people games.  And Dad taught me that there was no point in playing a game if you didn't try to win ("there's a reason you keep score", he said).  As the eldest child, Dad taught me a lot of card and board games.  He gave me no slack.  It was win or lose.  I respected that.  And it made me a good gameplayer.  I AM competitive.  Generally, I play to win. 

If you detect some guilt coming in here, you're right.

I was 20 by the time my youngest sister, Jennifer (deceased 2010 and sorely missed) started playing games herself.  I always won, but I showed her HOW I won, so she could learn (and she did) (which was more than I got from Dad).  You can ignore the father/son dynamics there...

And I still love to play games against people who are (or think they are) my equals (and a darn lot are better).  Otherwise you would be seeing me in chess or poker tournaments.

But, you know, lately I just don't care about winning so much.  Sometimes just playing is good enough, though I do try to win.  It's just that I'm not obsessive about it anymore.  Losing a game doesn't destroy my day.

So there I was at Pogo.com joining some games randomly (after staying up all night at them) and one game was doomed for me from the start because it was late in the game.  So the game ended and we started a new one.  Just 2 human players and 3 computer robots (who play quite well, BTW).  The routine is to kill of the Bots first, and the other guy agreed.  Something like this.


But then he turned the game over to his son (somewhere older than 12 and younger than 20 I would guess).  He was playing for a badge.  I know about the badges, but I don't pay any attention to earning them.  They just show up in my "space" sometimes. 

But this kid really wanted some particular badge and I was standing in his way.  He even attacked me before we killed the Bots. 

I felt for that kid.  I TRIED to lose.  Well, I didn't play suicidally, but I gave him every opportunity to win.  He got a winning position from his Dad.  And to be fair, I'm really good at comebacks.  Bit I really did try to let him win.  He didn't...  He even thanked me for the game.

So I feel like I failed by winning.

I didn't get a chance to explain to him how he lost (the games ends and all the players are gone).  If he learned anything from our game, I'll never know.

So my question.  Should I have tried harder to lose, or should I have tried harder to win faster?

I personally thrived in merciless competition, but some people don't.  So what do you think?